Posts filed under: ‘family‘




Lost Child

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The disconnected child,
Life as she knows it has been imperfect,
Given up at birth,
And shifted from agency to agency,
As a baby,
She learned how to walk,
She learned how to talk,
She played with other children,
Getting the love that she would never experience between herself and her biological mother,
The family she was placed with after being given up by her biological mother showed her an unkind love,
And she is lost.

A child with no place to call home within herself,
She’s now a young beautiful teenage girl,
Hope surprised her one day when her biological mother landed on her doorstep,
Love finally arrived and rescued her,
Yet she is in pain,
And she is lost.

The meeting between herself and her biological mother was emotional,
She had lots of questions,
Some painful,
Yet she had forgiveness,
Like twins, the two did some things in a similar way,
But still, from an emotional standpoint,
She is still lost.

At the meeting,
After all of her questions were answered,
Her mother kissed her forehead and assured her that everything would be alright,
From that point on,
The young teenage girl who had been given up at birth was no longer lost,
Why?
Because she had her mother to guide her which is what she always wanted.
No longer lost,
No longer yearning for real love,
She is free.

2 comments July 20, 2016

In Her Shoes

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Born January 27, 2005,
One of the best days of my life,
It marks the date my little ray of sunshine in the morning time came into this world,
There was pain,
Then I experienced joy when I saw her beautiful pink face,
My baby girl,
My little bundle of joy,
Mama’s new found inspiration.

Everything changed the moment I looked at things from your perspective,
From what location?
In your shoes,
No worries,
No fears,
A brand new life,
Destined to be the greatest.

Without you,
I have no hope,
Without you,
My world is lost,
The greatest moment of discovery is only a hidden gem,
Without you,
I have no inspiration.

In your shoes,
I know what it feels like to be a baby,
A child all over again,
Growing into the written destiny that has been laid out by my heavenly father,
Knowing that I’m blessed,
Along with the path that I journey on,
The gift of life,
I’ve been there,
There is no better place I’d rather be than in your shoes right now,
Wiggling my toes as the air of the lord slips between them,
Seeing things with no color,
Without any negative thought perception,
As I try to focus on the things that seem familiar in this great big room of exploration,
Reaching for you,
My fingertips are soft,
Wrinkled fingers,
I’m glad we traded places.

In your shoes,
There is a great escape from all the turmoil,
From all the bad things that lay and wait for me in this world,
Here is where I rest in peace,
A day. A lifetime,
In your shoes,
Peace is what I’ve found in you.

Add a comment June 22, 2016

Childhood Tall Tales: Image

image

I’m 12,
Mature and impressionable,
I’m not like most children my age,
I see the world with adult eyes.
You ask,
“What do I mean by that?”
I’ve been teased in school. Spirit broken down on a daily basis by those who have a fear of what I represent,
They see confidence, a little girl who is forced to mature on the adult level in order to deal with the brutality of self-image destruction by others,
Be it by little girl or boy,
Be it adult,
I have to deal.

What did you expect to read from these pages?
A fictional story about my life?
No. This is non-fiction which I am all about at the rightful age of 12.
I’m not caught up in fairy tales, monster dreams, or anything to do with playtime,
Why?
Because I’ve been robbed of my innocence all because I’m a beautiful flower that people choose to refer to as ugly.
From my big nose,
To my full lips,
To my nappy hair,
I’m a 12 year old caught up in image against my own free will.

Who do I blame for this?
The adults,
From magazines depicting skinny beautiful models with beautiful hair, beautiful lips, perfect noses,
To the exercise gurus who say the average waistline should be “28 inches”,
To the adults that say I will be nothing in my tomorrow because I don’t want to be what they think I should be,
Empty.

I’m 12,
And I’ve been humiliated,
My pain runs deep,
Deeper than the bottom of the ocean,
I just want to scream!
How can people be so cruel?

I don’t want to blame parents for their child beating my spirit down at the end of every class hour.
With some horrific words that eat away slowly at my soul,
Because, be it child or adult,
You still have a choice in the matter.

Image,
Why are my looks so important to everyone else, except me?
See what you’ve done adults?
You’ve confused me with your media race,
From your self-absorbed ads about happiness coming if I get involved in your campaign,
When I’m living as an adult at 12 in sadness,

But I have a grown up mind,
I don’t blame God for this,
Not at all,
Human beings have choices and the free will to do the right thing,
For instance,
In this case,
Stop telling tall tales,

Again,
I say,
I know you thought this would be a child’s storybook,
Filled with characters that you can imagine being,
But instead,
You get me.

I don’t know if it makes you happy or not,
To be in the midst with a 12 year old who is totally against the growing campaign that is going on,
What society believes to be true,
No,
You get a 12 year old who chooses to end her thoughts about the negative thoughts and actions of self-made individuals who poisoned half the world’s minds with their narrow-minded opinions.

My testimony stops here.

I’m 37,
A strong woman,
A bipolar survivor,
A mother,
A college graduate,
An author before business owner,
An independent thinking woman who has now set her own standards for what her image should depict to others,
A kindred spirit, fearless,
Encouraging others who have gone through the same,
Don’t ever be afraid to grow up against the odds,
Your spirit is always worthy of fighting for.

Add a comment June 16, 2016

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